Saturday, April 16, 2016

Self Image and Red Carpet Days

Self image has never been an easy topic for me. As a child, I was always a little heavier than other children, and my struggles with low confidence started early, as chronicled here.

Over the years, I've dealt with an eating disorder and countless days of low confidence. Very, very low. Depression tends to make low confidence even worse, and the two issues can spiral into an ugly, overwhelming mess. You feel you have nothing to dress up for, and then you feel that dressing up is too much work. In turn, you feel bad about yourself, and it continues on and on. You lose all hope of having a red carpet day again.

After all, the bad thoughts say, you have nothing to celebrate, and no one will want to celebrate you. If you were a stronger/smarter/better/more beautiful person, you would have the strength to put yourself together. Look how easy it is for other people!

But sometimes you need to break out your favorite lipstick or mascara, even when you don't plan to go anywhere, or see anyone. Sometimes there's magic in the physicality of setting out your favorite 'getting ready' tools. Sometimes there's magic in the right black eyeliner.

Lately I've fought back at low confidence and depression through a variety of means, but one of them has been busting out my favorite makeup and jewelry and getting red-carpet ready. Any day can be a red carpet day, if you feel like you need one. Get dressed up. Take some great pictures. Wear your amazing outfit just for sitting at your computer to write, or draw, or meditate, or bake a pie, or watch your favorite movie.

You can have a red carpet day at 2am or 6am or noon or 7pm. You can do it ANY time you want.

Here's a few pictures from recent "red carpet days."





3 comments:

  1. Wishing you many red carpet days, honey, but how do you build confidence when all you want to be is just not there?

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  2. Wishing you many red carpet days, honey, but how do you build confidence when all you want to be is just not there?

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  3. It's a difficult thing, that's for sure. Many times I have to force myself to do something physically when I'm not feeling it mentally. It's an ongoing battle! It was tough today. It's something that some of us will always struggle with. *hugs* to you. I hope you have more of those good days too <3

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